
Grief
Published October 2, 2024 by rlmcdermott


I’m just making my Art!
Why have I been so nice?

Did you
know that
I am dying
that I am
like a blue
crane flying
riding thermals
without wings
life is such
a fickle thing
it’s so hard
to let you go
yet so easy
to live alone
how could
I have loved
a moon that
never shines for me
am I grieving you
or grieving me
so long this dying
has to be–
a day a night
spent in the sky
who loves me
loves to fly
and in her
turning is
a turning
back to
the blue
lichen
and fleshy
moss dripping
from bare
trees where
wild gods sit
and play
songs on
white bone
she has
grown old
underneath
a silent moon
waiting for
something
that never
comes–
to be loved again
and as
her small
feet strike
stone a
note is
struck
on bone
white bone
that sings
of home–
a place she’s
never known 
I wonder why
for some of us
life is like a long
season of waiting.
Does the cone flower
know the brevity
of its dance;
its one brown
eye blasted daily
by the sun–
can it see
anything
but the sky?
I’m a flower too
and my season
has been long.
For me, there
is no fall
in this place
just an endless
summer of grief.
I am unnatural,
a seed lifted
by the breeze
and carried here–
distant from the prairie,
distant from the tall grass,
distant from the meadow lark,
and distant from that softer
season when the earth
puts on its gray hat
and takes its flowers home.
she dresses
you in red
and takes
you to her bed
you think that I don’t know
but flowers
grow beside
my heart
and tell me
all their secrets
the small hotel
the river Seine
the Paris sky
pain is all I know these days
you lied
I was myself
until you came
and sat beside me
on a garden bench
and asked my name
I couldn’t turn away
two years have passed
since that bright day
the moon has danced
across so many skies
all painted blue and
I grow old and cannot
die for love of you